This Version of Me Prioritizes Pleasure & Rest.

Happy Lovers Day!

At this point I hope you’re okay with my ebbs and flows when it comes to producing content and my social media presence lol. 

At first it bothered me that I couldn’t generate as consistently as I wanted. But now, I’ve realized — what a beautiful superpower this is to stop, rest, reflect, and start again.

One thing I’ve been mastering is regulating my nervous system.

When and where can I release tension?
When can I move a task from the front burner to the back?
When can I pause and take a deep breath?
When can I decide that my needs and my stillness are more important than this feeling of being overwhelmed.

I place my hand over my heart and show so much gratitude for the lessons I’ve learned up until this moment that has allowed me to become aware of how much I value pleasure and rest. Every morning I ask myself, how can I feel that today? What do I need to ensure that pleasure and rest is welcomed into my world?  

There were some days when I valued validation.
There were some days when I valued perfectionism.

I show grace to those old versions of me because though like any human, I still enjoy feeling validated, seen, and heard. I still enjoy structure, routines and perfecting small details — but the difference is, I no longer allow it to consume me. I welcome those feelings when they arise, but ultimately I ask – how can I turn this validation into pleasure, something that feels good? How can I embrace rest in the midst of my need for perfectionism? 

I was chatting with a friend and he mentioned that though we’ve known each other since 2019, he’s really glad that I get to know this present day, 2024 version of him.

I thought, what a beautiful perspective!

At any moment you can decide that you’d like to recreate, reform and renew!

Around December I decided, in addition to pilates, I wanted to become a running girlie. Well, last weekend -- I ran my first 5k race! 

And shoot, Beyonce is releasing a country album next month! 

You can decide — today, I’d like to be xyz, today I’d like to feel xyz, today I’d like to do things differently than I did yesterday.

How beautiful is that?

I am so in love with this version of me! This version of me is working on connection and isn’t afraid of being vulnerable. This version of me enjoys challenging herself and trying new things. This version of me takes life day by day and isn’t too hard on herself. This version of me is okay with failing.

This version of me’s world is full of love and joy.

Back in 2021, I wrote my first novel. A book that I soon realized was wayyy to close to my heart. Completely ignoring what Toni Morrison said, “You have to know not to fall in love with the sentences.” Baby, not only was I deeply in love – I was attached. I held on to every word of my manuscript with a mega grip. Taking every form of criticism around the book personal ...very personal. Like how dare you tell me something needs to be changed with MY baby!? Holding on to those fictional characters like they were my children.

It took almost two years to realize this. I was almost okay with shelving the book over accepting the constructive criticism for what it was and getting back to work.

As I released my grip, finger by finger, I began to detach and allow the story to unfold a little more. Cutting characters, changing locations. In 2024, I’m rewriting a story that looks nothing like it did in 2021. I am so proud of myself for simply starting over on something that was once complete and wrapped up with a bow in my eyes. I am proud of myself for not being so strict when it comes to “how long it’s taking?” or “what are people going to think?” I am so proud of myself for failing at this the first time, and having the strength to recreate and start again.

On January 26, 2024, Chapter Harmony celebrated 5 years of community. It doesn’t look like what it once did in 2019 when we started, and I’m sure it won’t look like it does today in 2025. But in a way, Chapter Harmony’s growth in the last 5 years is very similar to my own personal growth. And, boy oh boy, am I just grateful to be here - learning, healing, growing and loving.

How do you want to feel on this Valentine's day? Well, go feel it.

What version of yourself would you like to embody today? Well, go create it.

Sending you all my love and then some. 
Happy Valentine's Day, lovers!

Xo, Ry

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Affirmations to hold close to your heart today: 

Creative energy easily and effortlessly flows through my body. My creativity nourishes my body and soul. 

I invite warmth, pleasure and sensuality into my life. 

I share my love with others and I embrace intimacy. I am a lovable and desirable being. 

I invite pleasure and rest into my world and I enjoy it in all areas of my existence. I am living a pleasurable life. 

My body feels like warmth, safety and a comforting hug all wrapped in one. This feels like home.